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Help from the gods:
Your predestination writeup had a few major problems. First off:
This is in response to the Great Neb's statement about the Bible being big on free will.
Never do this. Each writeup should stand on its own. (Yes, I know that they don't always, but they should. Editors are gradually deleting older writeups that don't stand alone.)
Your writeup isn't about predestination in any way. It isn't on the topic, it just responds to a tangental and unsubstantiated comment in Great Neb's writeup. To refute it there is bad because then the topic is no longer predestination!
I have started reading some of the parts of the Bible that no one really pays too much attention too,
Sounds pretentious. There are some bible scholars on the site. Don't presume or imply others are not as well read.
one that stands out as being anti- free will is the book of Deuteronomy.
The words are OK but it's linked badly. Linking should be to nodes that exist, or you think ought to.
- "[anti- free will]" should be "anti-free will"
- "[book of Deuteronomy]" should simply be "Deuteronomy" - lots of good stuff at Deuteronomy
All of these laws or whatever they may be seem so unsubstantiated that I have lost a lot of respect for the validity of the Bible and its passages.
This is a very weak conclusion, I'd drop it.
... and so on. Here's one way to redo it, which you could post under free will or Deuteronomy.
One section of the Bible that stands out as being anti-free will is Deuteronomy. In it, Moses sets out laws, some that seem logical and others outright odd. Many of them restrict one's free will. According to these laws, I shouldn't eat pork (14:7-8) for Thanksgiving, and also I shouldn't wear poly cotton blend sweaters (22:11).
If the same thing that happened to Mr. Bobbitt should occur to me, then why I would not be allowed into the house of God - neither the proverbial nor the physical (23:1)?
Insert new conclusion here that ties things back together.
Even then, there are still problems - the rule about pork was health related, because they didn't know how to cook it so that it was safe to eat, for example. But at least you'd have a writeup that could be further improved, and not nuke-bait. I hope this helps you get an idea of how to improve.